Your Wedding Ceremony - Read or Repeat the Vows?

A Wedding Celebrant’s Perspective – Carol Smith, The Somerset Celebrant
Stu making his vows to Caitlin
As a wedding celebrant, when the happy couple send you some photos of their special day to say a massive thank you for conducting their wedding ceremony, you know you’ve done a good job and I thank them for their generosity in allowing me to share them.

It is often said that a picture says a thousand words. I hope this lovely photograph taken by Richard Skins inspires you to have the courage and imagination to have the wedding ceremony that you want, unique, personal and memorable, one that reflects who you are as a couple.

This beautiful outdoor wedding ceremony was held at Anran, Devon under a rustic pergola decorated with drapes and flowers. Beyond the pergola was the rolling Devon countryside, stretching as far as the eye can see, rising up to meet the sky on the distant horizon.

Many couples, choose to make their wedding vows by reading them to each other. Although, initially this seems a daunting prospect and it appears far easier to repeat them line by line after the celebrant, I do believe it’s worth overcoming the nerves, particularly for the longer vows and read them out, rather than repeat them.

Here’s some reasons why.

In most wedding ceremonies there are many occasions when the couple speak, for example during the Declaration, the Vows and Promises, the Ring Exchange and maybe even saying a poem or some words. It makes a wedding ceremony more interesting and lively if different ways of delivering these words are used. For example maybe repeat after the celebrant for the Ring Exchange as you’ll have enough to do getting the ring on, and just a simple, ‘I do’ or ‘I will’ for the Declaration of Intent, and then enjoy reading the Vows you have spent months thinking about and writing!

Wedding Vows can often be quite long. If they are repeated each time after the celebrant during the ceremony, it means they are actually said four times and this can become a little boring for your guests to sit through.

Repeating vows after the wedding celebrant can stop the narrative flow, jokes and anecdotes, or poignant meaningful words can be lost and they may sound disjointed.

Nervous about speaking?

Don’t be

At this point in your wedding ceremony, you will probably have seen a friend or two, or a family member give a reading or share a poem which your guests have clearly enjoyed from the laughter or the applause its created. Everyone is happy and this gives you the encouragement you may need to say them.

Also, I often find that people who are the most nervous beforehand are often extremely calm on their wedding day !( And visa-versa !)

Worried you will forget to bring them on the day ?

Don’t be.

I will print your wedding vows using a clear size 16 font, onto parchment paper and wrap them up in some beautiful silk ribbon that matches your wedding colours.

I will bring them with me to your wedding ceremony and hand them to you, just at the moment that I invite you to make your precious vows to your partner.

Having the courage to read your wedding vows in full, directly to your partner, without the prompting of the celebrant, will certainly create a tender, beautiful and meaningful moment, in the heart of your wedding ceremony.

Please feel free to contact me regarding weddings, civil partnerships, renewal of vows, naming and funeral ceremonies.

Let me work with you to create a truly bespoke, precious and memorable occasion.

Carol

uksoc

Member of the UK Society of Celebrants