Six Reasons to have a Renewal of Vows Ceremony
A Wedding Celebrant’s Perspective
Renewal of Vows Ceremonies have been really hitting the headlines recently, in part due to the growing popularity among many famous celebrities for renewing their marriage vows. These have ranged from extremely lavish ceremonies, to small and intimate gatherings.
Vow renewals are not just for the rich and famous and do not have to be lavish affairs. What is important is the meaning behind the vows themselves, and their significance in a couple’s marriage.
As a wedding celebrant, I have led many Vow Renewal Ceremonies. Each one is unique and special. What is particularly meaningful are the different reasons why a couple have decided to renew the vows they made to each other on their wedding day, and I will share some of these with you.
However, despite the differences in their reasons, every couple seem to share the same feeling, that, no matter how long ago they made their marriage vows, that this moment was exactly the most perfect and fitting time to renew them.
To commemorate a milestone anniversary
Maybe you’ve made it to 5, 10, 15, 20 or 25 years and want to celebrate your lasting love in an age where it is clearly evident, that not all marriages are, ‘till death do us part’.
As part of their ceremony, some couples like to take a nostalgic look back at their ‘courting days.’ This has included replaying the music they loved, mentioning the pubs and nightclubs they used to frequent, their first car, the trendy clothes, the full head of hair!!
One lovely couple, celebrating their 40th wedding anniversary, walked up the aisle together, as Abba’s “Take a Chance on Me’, belted out. The wedding breakfast was a retro meal of Chicken in a Basket, followed by Orange Sorbet served in scooped out frozen oranges. Disco dancing under the glitter ball was to Abba and The Bee Gees. Needless to say, the Pina Coladas and Harvey Wallbangers flowed all night!!
Couples regret that they were not able to have the wedding ceremony they wanted
Many couples I have worked with have felt that their wedding ceremony did not reflect who they were as a couple. Some have told me that they were considered too young to have much say in their wedding day and it was taken over by their parents. Others regretted having a church wedding when they were not at all religious, whilst others felt their registry office wedding was prescriptive and impersonal.
Renewing your vows give you the opportunity to re-live your wedding day and this time have it the way you want it.
Ability to stay strong after a difficult time
Life is certainly like a box of chocolates, and when we marry, we embark on life together, not knowing what the future holds.
Renewal of vows ceremonies are often for couples who have experienced some difficult or tragic times over the course of their marriage. This has often meant that one person has had to rely more heavily on the other, or they have really had to pull together to get through some extremely tragic circumstances.
These vow renewal ceremonies are a wonderful celebration of the strength of a couple and a reaffirming of the commitment of their marriage vows, and are often the most joyous, fun filled occasions, full of laughter and happiness.
A lovely lady chose to renew her vows to say a big, public thank you to her husband for sticking around when, in her words, ‘some men would have run a mile’. As a couple, they also wanted to give a big thank you to all their friends and family for all the time, love and support, they’d given them over the years.
A new beginning
Sometimes, couples decide to draw a line on what’s gone before. Maybe things have happened in the marriage which were not good, however, the couple still love each other and want very much to save their marriage, reaffirm their commitment to each other, and move forward.
These vow renewal ceremonies often act as reminder of why a couple chose to get married in the first place, and enables them to relive the moments and feelings they once felt, during their wedding.
A bit more cash to splash second time round
Many couples look back to their wedding day and feel that due to only having a limited budget, or being downright skint, they didn’t have the wedding they dreamed of having.
One couple I worked with, told me that when they thought about their wedding day they always regretted that there wasn’t the big white dress, tiara and beautiful bouquet, or the new suit. Their guest list was extremely short and the reception consisted of some sandwiches and sausage rolls in a drafty skittle alley. They made a promise to each other that one day they would have the wedding of their dreams, with all the fancy trimmings. In fact, the first thing the husband did on deciding to have a vow renewal ceremony was to buy himself a wedding ring as he’d always hated the fact that for twenty-five years of marriage he’d never had one. He also bought an amazing ring for his wife.
This vow renewal ceremony truly reflected a couple who had worked hard together over the years of their marriage. From starting with very little they had built a business, done well and prospered. Most importantly, they appreciated all that they had, and that life had been good to them, and they wanted to share this with their friends.
Perhaps the best and most important reason of all, is to celebrate your love.
In a vow renewal ceremony, a couple remember the promises they made to each other on their wedding day. The vows were important to them then, and they are important now. They enable the couple to re-affirm their love, as they embark on the next stage of their married life together.
As well as a celebration of the love a couple have for each other, a vow renewal ceremony is also a celebration of family and friends. Many couples use the ceremony as a big thank you to everyone who has loved and supported them over the years and played a significant part in their lives.
It’s lovely to include your children in your ceremony, and there are so many different and special ways to do this.
One couple, Roger and Deirdre, had a daughter with an amazing voice. She sang ‘True Colours’ to her parents, in tribute to the support they had given each other during their difficulties over the years.
Another couple pledged their continual love and support to their children in their vows and presented them with silver bangles, when they exchanged their rings.
Some children have treated their parents to a vow renewal ceremony for a significant wedding anniversary, which is a wonderful and loving gesture.
As you can see, each couple have many different reasons for choosing to renew their vows. By choosing a celebrant they make their ceremony unique, personal and memorable, one that reflects their journey together to this point, and reaffirms their commitment to their future life together.
Whatever your reasons, make your vow renewal ceremony a memorable one!